lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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