All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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