dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
