I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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