Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
