my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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