South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
