Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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