I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
