the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
