Porn is love you can see.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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