if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
