i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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