i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
