just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize