look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
