HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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