My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I had to cum in my sink.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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