All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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