i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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