wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize