don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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