fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
