his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize