I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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