he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
