even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
