Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
