how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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