I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
