so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
