Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
