We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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