I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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