Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
