I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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