..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
