Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
