Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
don't judge my taste in strippers
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
