How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
