his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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