smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
