the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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