I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
