I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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