Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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