I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
