when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize