Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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