she was so not down for the gang bang
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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